Brian's World

The cycle

My summers are a cycle of boring. I’ve never done anything exciting, nor am I used to doing anything exciting. And unfortunately I know I’m bringing other summers down with me. When you’re used to a great summer filled with fun and adventure, and you join my summer; you’re introduced into a world of boredum. I don’t know anything besides what I have. I don’t know how to have fun, where to have fun, or even what to do in summer. I missed that part of “growing up” and I can’t find it. There’s something about being a 13-16 that allows fun to just appear for you, and for me fun did appear, don’t get me wrong there; but I was pulled away to Vermont whenever it did appear.

And now I feel awful, when people are waiting on me and I’m not able to do things for one reason or another. I know one reason is fear of continued failure, or the lack of coming up with things to do. I know the other is out of my control (aka parental units). I know some are in my control, like what I plan to do and such.

I know one thing that has kept me busy. I’ve been working on a project for a little while (a few months) now and its definately the largest project I’ve undertaken to date. It’s due Friday, and it will be a miracle how I get it done. I have about 3 hours of raw footage that need to be cut into good footage that needs to be put together. So far I’m leaning towards one hour, currently I have around 12 mins of high quality completed video. Why the last minuteness?

a) I lost the master tape that had the final “glue” of the video (aka narration)

b) My usual editing times were not available because I was hanging out with people

c) I cannot Instant Message/Myspace and edit at the same time. The editing software crashes and melts.

d) I cannot stand the repeated use of w.e. to express frustration. To me it shows an unwillingness to try. Sorry, completely off topic but it popped into my mind.

e) I spent too much trime thinking and not enough time doing

f) Darn, I just forgot f.. trust me, it exists… think think think… I had to change plans at least 5 times because of LACK OF COOPERATION

g) That wasn’t the f I was thinking of…well.. who cares… no one!

In other news… I’m hoping on a plane to SC on Sunday morning, at a very early hour of the morning.. I’m excited. I like airplanes, I dislike mom trying to help me pack, I like waves, I dislike salt water.

There is other news, I don’t feel like shareing tho… just know its my fault, like always.. and listen to the Over My Head song.. the part about waiting on a cue…