Brian's World

Where (do) I go wrong?

Let me tell you a few things about myself. My name is Brian Michalski, I’ve been alive for a little while. I have a brother, Kevin, and a Mom and Dad. I have 1 living grandparent (grandma on mom’s side), the rest are dead.

I consider myself decent with a computer, I can generally trick them into doing as I please. My web development language of choice is PHP with MySQL as the database. I spend a good deal of my spare time working with computers, learning different technology things, etc.

I don’t think I’m half bad at directing TV news. While I lack any formal training, I run a pretty tight ship. Unfortunately I don’t have means to practice this skill at the moment.

I dislike a lot about myself, most of which I find very strange and difficult to understand. I have no problem picking up a piece of Business Intelligence Reporting software and ripping it to pieces to develop a better solution, but I have a severe problem planning an afternoon with friends. I’m experienced camping in the woods for a week or two with minimal contact, but going for a few days away with others seems to be impossible. I can do a complete overhaul a shuttle tracking system in a matter of days, but I haven’t once in my lifetime been “invited” to a party with more than 10 people. [Note: I’ve been invited through someone else who was invited, but thats a different degree of invitation, I was referencing first degree]. I can safely say that any hours I’m awake after 11pm have been spend with 0-2 people. (0 implying alone, 2 implying my brother and Katie). Most people would attribute this to some video game or antisocial behavior I exhibit. I don’t think so, I’m not a video game addict (I’ve barely played more than 10 hours this entire summer), nor do I stare at a TV for all hours of the day. I don’t exhibit antisocial behavior, I engage in conversation and don’t like to outcast people. Personally I make a very good wall flower. The majority of my friendships have technology at the core of them.

All of these things I’m not uncomfortable with, some make up the very fabric of me. But sometimes they upset me, because I try hard and I just can’t seem to change. I’d like to say the forces limiting me are out of my control but theres no easy test for that. I just don’t know.

Alas is the life of Brian