Brian's World

Starting again

Yawn. I’m back at RPI sitting in CS 2. The professor is more understandable, but the material is still boring. I’m hoping this is simply because its a review day but who knows. The first lab certainly looks easy as well. Too bad the courses I’m actually interested in taking have a ton of prerequisetes and I won’t be able to take them until junior or senior year. At the point I’ll learn something I enjoy working with and am actually interested in.

For me I found coming back to school after the Holiday break to be harder than coming here in the Fall. Most would suspect the transition to be easier, already knowing all the fundamentals like how to work a meal plan, do laundry, find most classes, etc. For me, I agree… those aspects are definately easier, but without having to worry about the small things, I’m very much likely to loose my mind. If I can worry about small things, easy things, routine things, I can avoid issues that I really don’t want to address, feeling of sadness, seperation, discontent.

Its not that I dislike RPI, I’m just very frustrated at it. Call me in the storming stage if you must. I would really like to work on projects that I’m interested, take a course that I’d enjoy. I feel that some of these courses really aren’t helping me at all, I’d like to learn more about PHP, Mysql, Web Programming, CSS, AJAX, Python, etc. But I feel like I have to spend a few semesters in acoma, doing things that I could do in High School just to prove that I know it.

Another factor is the projects I have in my mind that are driving me crazy. I have a few good ideas floating around, but they’re difficult to implement in my “spare time”. Unfortunately I’m not skilled enough to make them fully work at the current time, but I know that with some resources they are very viable. Of course there is a 0% chance any large company will notice me and my ideas and give me a call. Even more frustrating is that someone who has the money has just started developing a core component of my idea and placing it out for beta. I’m signed up so I can ridicule it. See, another company could have had this idea and extended it further and cooler but nooo.. who would find me.

See, I just want to be doing things that aren’t DiffEq or Discrete Structures…

Then again, I just completely lost my train of thought.