Where I don't care what others think

:’-( Yesterday, all our troubles seemed so far away…

March 5th, 2006 Posted in Problems

I’m not exactly sure how comfortable I feel writing this but this is the internet, and if you can’t share your feeling with an impossibly large community of sceptic peers, who can you share them with?

Again, my hesitation kind of influences how much details I plan on providing, because the matter at hand is not exactly mine, but it has an impact on me so I feel you all should know. If I ever seem depressed or sadd or out of my usual self, there is a chance I am being effected by this.

I’m not sure if I can beat around the bush any longer, but I’ll keep trying. It’s going to be a very interesting “journey” over the next few weeks and month and hopefully not years, I know how much my dad hates Doctors and tests and procedures and such, but I’m confident he’ll pull through. He better… I’m not giving him any other options being the oldest son… yeah… I’m gonna stop that thread. But ok, I already said my dad so I’ll just fill you in. My dad has cancer. Prostate Cancer to be exact, he went in a few weeks ago (like 2) and they did stuff and we got a call last week, Thursday?, telling him. Actually, I answered the phone and the lady lied to me because she told me it was about his car, well… his car is a company car so why would they call the house…. but grr to her. I guess that’s what they do to not upset us young children. Well, Kevin over heard mom and dad talking using his super spy skills and told me.. i spent the night very sad until yesterday or maybe Friday when dad told me. Oh yeah, I never mentioned that the doctor said the cancer was detected in a very early stage and he’s almost garunteed to make a full recovery. Ok, I trust doctors but if I was talking to a patient over the phone, I would tell them the most optimistic situation possible.

Now it looks as if they’re hear to stay…. (title connection)… actually, I’m probably thinking too much but I know my dad’s dad (I can’t spell the polish name we called him but it sounds like a sneeze sound) died of cancer… actually I think it was like 2 or 3 cancers at once. Totally unfun, he was really cool and probably the closest person to me and he was a lot like me, technical and gadget-wise. While my dad keeps the exact details of his dad’s cancer secret from us because my grampa would be embarased/disappointed in himself, I’m pretty sure it was a combo of lung/prostate… so now you know more of my family background.. isn’t that pleasent. Don’t ask me about my other grampa from my mom’s side… he died when my mom was a kid from a stroke/heart attack or something. But based on the hereditary traits I’m lucky to still be alive, aren’t I optomistic….
Now that you read that, I ask 1 thing… don’t go talking to my mom or dad about this because they really don’t understand the internet. Sure, family knows and stuff but it’s not something you wear on your sleeve for everyone to see. So keep this on the d/l if you get my drift.

I also don’t want your pity or something like that…. to make me happy the best thing you can do is make yourself happy. Because happy people make me happy. Or find a way to get me out of this house, because you can slice the tension with a butter knife…


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